At the beginning of November, I was thrilled to attend an online screening of the independent film Me Little Me! It’s a thought-provoking work that shows aspects of the eating disorder recovery experience not typically represented in the mainstream, making it an incredibly important film, and I thought I’d share a bit about what makes it unique in an effort to highlight all the ways society so often gets it wrong. Below is a list of the ways in which Me Little Me veers away from common – and highly problematic – tropes about eating disorders.
I have done my best to avoid major spoilers for those who wish to see the film, but please be aware that a few minor details are revealed below.
1. The representation is well-done and important.
The fact that the main character in this film is a working-class Black woman, likely in her late twenties or early thirties, whose body is neither noticeably small or noticeably large, is in and of itself a rebuke of the same old, tired tropes. Mya is not the ultra-thin white teenage girl typically represented in media about eating disorders, which made me very happy to see; nothing against ultra-thin white teenage girls, of course, but the fact remains that they are vastly overrepresented, and that this overrepresentation leads to rampant missed and incorrect diagnoses for anyone struggling with an eating disorder who does not fit the mold.
Additionally, the diverse cast of characters is fantastic, particularly in the scenes at Mya’s outpatient recovery program. People of varying colors, ages, genders, shapes, and sizes are shown in the program, which further underscores the point that eating disorders can happen to anyone.
2. The portrayals of Mya struggling with her eating disorder are thoughtful and trauma-informed.
It struck me while watching the film that Mya’s disordered eating behaviors were not actually shown – at least, not in the classic sense. Other media portrayals offer no qualms about displaying these behaviors explicitly, often going so far as to hone in on all the “strange” mannerisms and habits in a way that feels voyeuristic – a borderline fetishization. All the portrayal of eating disorders behaviors creates a person who is unrelatable instead of a person struggling that we can have compassion for and even relate to the pain a person with eating disorders carries. Me Little Me does nothing of the sort. As someone with a history of anorexia, I often find films about eating disorders triggering in a tantalizing sort of way that is incredibly unhealthy. This was not the case with Me Little Me; the story was told in such a manner that the viewer did not need to be indulged with the nitty-gritty details in order to be drawn into Mya’s struggle and accept it as legitimate. This is a major breakthrough, in my opinion, as I imagine so many others, like myself, struggle to watch ED-related topics for fear that it may reignite harmful patterns.
3. Mya is the focus – not her eating disorder.
Just as with the respect granted in the refusal to document specific disordered eating behaviors, the film also refuses to reduce Mya only to her disorder. Instead, she is multifaceted and complex. Despite the characterization of Mya as a fairly guarded person who keeps others at a distance, she is nevertheless whole and real; we see her barely-contained excitement at having received a promotion, the discomfort she feels in certain situations, her attempts at dealing with loneliness, and a strong display of emotion when old familial wounds resurface, all of which serve to craft a life around her that includes her eating disorder, rather than a life that has become her eating disorder. This is vital, as it rejects broad generalizations and reflects the truth, once again, that eating disorders are a human issue that can impact anyone.
4. The film offers a glimpse into recovery that is less medicalized and more focused on the mental health aspect.
Much of the mainstream media about eating disorders delves into the medical risks and the long-term consequences on the body. While these impacts are undoubtedly serious, I’ve found less representation than I’d like to see of the mental and emotional outcomes. Me Little Me does a great job with this aspect in particular, showing relapse less as a medical danger and more as a person in the throes of what looks a lot like deep depression: unable to get out of bed, missing work, and withdrawing from the world around them. The film also points to unresolved trauma and the ways it can contribute to disordered eating, especially in moments when trauma triggers render a person especially vulnerable.
Even the setting of Mya’s home and the treatment center, with inspirational messages of self-love and acceptance written on everything from signs on the walls to painted rocks on the porch, points to mental health as a vital central focus in conversations around eating disorders.
5. The film offers a glimpse into recovery to include finances and real world realities.
As an eating disorder psychologist, I spend a great deal of time working with clients to manage the financial aspect of treatment. This includes writing letters for insurances, corresponding with insurance companies, and helping clients manage work and school loads so that they can participate in treatment. It is never easy and often involves negotiating aspects of treatment so that my clients can pay their bills. I have seen time and time again in mainstream films how people easily enter treatment with no discussion around financial impact. Mya is seen struggling to manage her work and her eating disorder treatment. She has to hide her treatment from her work and you can visibly and emotionally feel her struggle.This financial struggle is real for many people with eating disorders.
Everyone’s situation is different, of course, and no film will ever capture all the nuance of everyone who’s struggled with an eating disorder. However, Me Little Me does a lot for dialogue around eating disorders, and my hope is that mainstream media can pay attention to this beautiful film, take the hint, and – hopefully – learn from it.
Here is the website of the film and where you can watch it!
https://www.melittlemefilm.com
https://www.melittlemefilm.com/wheretowatch
Thank you Elizabeth Ayiku for your incredible work and determination to make this film a reality. I am proud to be a contributor to your film.
And thank you Project Heal for partnering with Elizabeth to support this film!